Blog Archives

Amnesia, anyone?

Posted on November 7, 2011 by sheryl

I’ve been fascinated with movies about people who wake up, usually in the hospital and don’t know their name, and don’t remember their roles (wife, husband, employee) or their habits (happy guy, quiet person, music lover).  While on the one hand, that seems like a nightmare that you’d want to wake up from, my fantasy is that it would be the most freeing day of the year.  What if you could start tomorrow on an absolutely clean slate – what would you create for your life?

An important part of creating your life is the ability to dream that life in a new way.  So often yesterday’s definitions about who you are, what you can do, and how you act keep yanking you out of your day.  Especially when recovering from a traumatic even, it is easy to allow that event to define you. But, you can choose what your reaction to that event in your past will be, and that decision will help define your future.

How about beginning with as blank a slate as you can, as best you can, and breathing into the present moment.  Take as small a step as you can to move forward into your day. 

Here’s to a brilliant new day, dawning just the way you want in just the right way.

Posted in Frozen in Fear, Just Stuck, PTSD, Trauma | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

“Dem Bones, Dem Bones”

Posted on August 3, 2011 by sheryl

Remember those cute minnows swirling around your feet as you wade out into the ocean? They have intact backbones and really aren’t succeeding. Neither are the jellyfish stranded on the sand in the outgoing tide. Many people understand that BACKBONE, will, drive, Hard Work and discipline are critical to success.

As we look at obstacles to business success, consider the obstacle of no WISHBONE – no time to set vision, create focus and intention. Yes, we talk about annually an quarterly stepping back to create vision and specific strategies, but have you considered bringiing that practice into the month, the week, the day, or even the next hour?  Setting vision for the day or the hour, is more like setting your intention for this day to be _______(productive, nurturing, energized, giving, fulfilling – fill in the blank) and holding that intention as you take on your action steps for that day.

What I see happening so often, is sitting down at my desk, with a carefully prepared list of action steps that may or may not match my strategy, then working very HARD with all my drive, will, discipline until my neck hurts, I’m cranky and I know, from my work on professional burn-out, that I’m on my way down that path, fighting the tide and finally ending up as food for the big players. [OK, that's a little dramatice, but you get the point].

To bring joy, success, as well as long term contribution in my field, I engage both bones. Here’s my check list:

  • Is what I’m about to do consistent with my intention for the day?
  • Is what I’m about to do consistent with my strategy for the quarter?
  • Do I have the energy to do this with my full attention and my full heart?
  • Can I do this from a place of power and energy, or from a place of just surviving?

No to any one of these questions may suggest that I’m driving and striving, just like those little minnows and maybe I’ll still be fighting the ocean when the day is done.  As you look at what obstacles may be limiting your success, consider the marriage of both your will and your self-discipline (BACKBONE) with your visioning, your intentions, and your heart (WISHBONE). This is the essence of linking the Law of Attraction to the Law of Action – and that marriage real Olympic Gold.

Posted in Business Strategy, Create your Business, Just Stuck, Law of Attraction | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Level Five Spin Ninja

Posted on July 26, 2011 by sheryl

One of my favorite comics is called “Non Sequitur”. It has an interesting little girl who makes some wild pronouncements about the world. Recently, she said,

“The Spin Ninja code states that luck favors the prepared

My goal is to become a level 5 Spin Ninja”.

That has gotten me thinking about the link of the Law of Atrraction and the Law of Action. Really, when you think about it, “Spin” is just a way of thinking about a thing – your life, an event, a job, whatever. We think of “Spin”in terms of attempting to convince someone else about something. President Regan was said to be able to turn even failures into a victory with his suave spin savvy. Unfortunately, it is also said that President Carter wasn’t able to use spin to turn a victory into a victory.

How about you, are you able to find the victory in your own events, and to use spin (in your thinking) to support yourself to create positive outcomes from your daily events?

And what about the “luck-favors-the-prepared”?  How prepared are you to receive those things that you are trying to create?  If you’re looking to bring a spouse into your life, is there room in your garage and your bathroom for another person?  If you’re looking to grow your business, is your current calendar filled completely with no room for those new clients or customers, even if they came?  If not, consider some preparation might be in order, and that is using the Law of Action with your intention.

I’m aiming to be a Level Five Spin
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No Loopholes in Intention

Posted on July 1, 2011 by sheryl

One of the Laws of Attraction that I attend to is the awareness that wherever I put my attention, I’m also placing my energy and thereby, my power. I also know that any words that I speak are filled with my energy and become powerful in my life. Since I know there are are no loopholes, no way around this law, I was shocked to hear what came out of my own mouth this morning as I looked at the scales – which haven’t moved in a month or so – and said “I just can’t lose this weight, what’s wrong with me, anyway”.

Based on this Law of Attraction, I just set in motion a self fulfilling prophecy.

OH RATS!!

I’m also the strengths based coach, so taking energy to discover what is wrong with me, might not be the best use of my focus. Here are my notes-to-self that I thought you might appreciate, too:

  1. What has actually improved over the last month that represents my real priority?
  2. What strengths do I have that will support my intention to be healthy and smaller?
  3. Assuming, I’ve been living On Purpose, what has the purpose of the past month been?
  4. What is the intention for this month?
  5. What is the one thing I desire independence from and what is the one dream I desire to celebrate at the end of July?

OK, world, here are my answers:

  1. What has improved? I’ve added walking regularly to my habits and am beginning to feel more energy.
  2. What are my strengths? My strength this month is my loyalty to the health of my puppy, who needs to walk every day.
  3. My true purpose? My true purpose for this last month has been to adapt to Sammy, and to survive getting up a couple times in the night to let him visit his favorite puppy-pee places.
  4. My intention for this month is to keep my focus on my business, to continue healthy walks, to find a way to be alpha dog while protecting the puppyhood of His Littleness.
  5. I want independence from a preconceived idea of how my body wants to return to health and vitality and I want to celebrate comfortably zipping up my favorite shorts.

As we move into a new month, and the third quarter of the year, remember, there are no loopholes in the link between your intentions and your results. Thoughts and words are things – chose the good ones.

Posted in Create your Business, Create your Career, Just Stuck | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

What is your Intention with your Hard Work?

Posted on June 9, 2011 by sheryl

I’ve learned an important lesson this quarter, and it’s about the action half of the Law of Attraction. I’ve always been a focused, hard worker – you know that “Protestant Work Ethic” idea? And I have a strong confidence in my own ability to do anything I set my mind to, and I pretty much always have done that (except for my forray into raising rabbits – I’ll talk about that next week).

The curse of being able to do a lot of stuff, like computer programming, sew clothing, can beans, grind wheat, make bread from scratch, clean house, create gardens, train dogs…..is that it just isn’t possible to enjoy all those things. I’m not a professional seamstress or a skilled web designer, but I often get myself caught in a “should” of since-I-know-how-to-do-that, I SHOULDN’T pay-someone-else syndrome.  I found an interesting quote this week that really caught my eye:

“Many high performers would rather do the wrong thing well than do the right thing poorly. And when they do find themselves in over their head, they’re often unwilling to admit it, even to themselves, and refuse to ask for the help they need.”

I’ve been stuck for the last several weeks, trying to do some wrong things, and struggling to do the right things poorly – and worse yet, not at all. Last week, I hired a professional to do some things that I don’t know how to do, but was confident that I could figure it out, and it’s an enormous relief to my schedule, to my creativity, and to my day.

What on earth have I been ‘thinking’ all these years? What are those things that you do very well and easily that bring juice to your day, and what are those things that you sort of can do that drain your energy – is it time to ask for help with those tasks?

Posted in Create your Business, Create your Career, Frozen in Fear, Just Stuck | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

Making a Life or just Making Living

Posted on May 19, 2011 by sheryl

There’s a bumper sticker that I see around that says “I owe, I owe, so off to work I go”. It just breaks my heart, and I find myself wanting to pull over the driver and, in my fantasy, be that altruistic millionaire from the TV show, and invite them off that hook with a big fat check. I shortly snap myself back to reality, though, and realize that it’s really all about intention, and a million dollars won’t help someone whose intention is to just go to work and drudge through the day.

If the intention is to make a living, create enough cash flow to stay out of debt and to put a roof over your head, then the way you get out of bed and the creative energy you use is specific to that intention. In this mode, you may get out of bed with an alarm clock to help you punch in at work on time. You get out of bed grumbly and drag yourself to work. Your creativity and joy are buried under a heap of that gumbling and you have very few areas of your life that are energizing or fun.

If your intention is to make a life, you may very well go to exactly the same job in the previous scenario. You still get up with the alarm clock, but, since this is the life your are creating, you might enjoy a morning walk with your tunes, your dog, or even a friend. On the way to work, if finding joy at work is the life you intend, then you may be thinking about the day’s projects and the day’s contacts and how you can enjoy them. If not, you may be thinking about your lunch plans, and crafting in your mind how to teach your young-in to catch better or memorize history lessons.

You can make a life while making a living, and some people make a life out of making a living (those career focused people – of whom I am one). If, however, you find those times when you’re just making a living and not loving it – that might be a good time to revisit your intentions.

  1. When you were 16 or 18, before you began your adult life, what did you dream it might be?
  2. What part of that dream might you incorporate into this day?
  3. Is it time to step back and ask what it is you really want in your life?
  4. What values do you live by that need to be expressed in your life?
  5. What brings you joy, and how can that be incorporated into your day?

I’m inviting you to examine your deepest intentions, and explore how they might be expressed.

Posted in Create your Business, Create your Career | Tagged , , | 5 Comments

Start with WHAT, HOW comes later

Posted on April 27, 2011 by sheryl

I ran across a quote of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. this week which really caught my eye -

“Faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase.”

This is especially appropriate when we look at getting unstuck and moving forward to create your business and your career. So many times, our choice of a goal gets dumbed-down because we can’t figure out how it’s going to happen, or, as Dr. King said, we can’t see all the steps between here and there. Part of the art of setting intention is just setting it and having trust in your own inner courage and power to move in that direction, knowing that there is a way, and your feet will find it – maybe even in spite of your mind which is wildly trying to think up HOW.

Years ago I used to write down everything I wanted in my life as a New Year’s day activity. Since I was flying private airplanes at the time, one of those things was to have a home that backed onto a private airstrip so I could just pull my plane out of the hanger next to my house and take off. Of course I couldn’t see the end of that staircase, but it went on my list anyway. Same with the swimming pool I thought would be lovely in my backyard, and the business I wanted to start. None of those dreams came with a how, they were just MY DREAM. Truth be told, a year or two later, I wasn’t interested in the pool (too much to clean, and too risky for my children’s safety) or in the home on an airstrip (too noisy and isolated from the city) and I’ve run my business successfully now for 18 years even though I put that on my “Dream” list 30 years ago.

WHAT intentions would you set if you didn’t have to come up with the HOW first?

Posted in Create your Business, Create your Career, Just Stuck | Tagged , , , , | 14 Comments

WHEN IT’S TIME TO FIND A NEW JOB – Here’s five tips to help

Posted on April 20, 2011 by sheryl

My job is killing meLast week, we talked about ways to manage your own attitude when burn-out and frustration threaten your job. Today, we’ll chat about some initial steps for when it’s clearly the job, and no amount of brisk walking or meditation is going to make that different. Many people just try to run away – send out lots of resume’s, quit and leave screaming from the building, close down their business and seek a different profession. The problem with these escape strategies, is that they are running FROM and there isn’t a clear vision of running TOWARD.

  1. Start with your strengths – when you’re at the point of needing to escape, often your self-esteem has eroded, and you need to take some time to get back in touch with your strengths. Try the Strengths assessment you can find on this page. It will take 30-40 minutes and will help you get back on your own game.
  2. Make a list of the things you do well, those tasks you enjoy at work, at home, at church, at your health club – in any part of your life.
  3. Describe for yourself what your ideal day looks like, not in terms of a specific job or company or agency, but in terms of who you see, what you contribute, how the environment feels. (You can ask for a free “Desired Outcome” conversation with Sheryl, a certified coach to help you with this step – having someone ask those leading questions will make the creation of this new vision easier for you.)
  4. Write your own mission statement, WHY do you want to do what you do in that ideal day.

Now, and not until you know your strengths, your skills, your vision, and your mission will you be able to run TOWARD your future, rather than escape your past.

What are you running toward today?

Posted in Create your Career | Tagged , , , , | 1 Comment

“WHY is your WHAT”, said the Cheshire cat

Posted on April 12, 2011 by sheryl

By Sheryl Eldene, MA, MBA, PCC

Recently, I heard someone ask the question, “What would you attempt to do if you knew that you couldn’t fail?”

I LOVE questions because when you ask a question, you MUST give yourself an answer. It’s not negotiable. As that question kicks around in your head – you inevitably decide on the answer.

The problems come when you ask yourself the wrong question. What’s the wrong question? WHY IS THE WRONG QUESTION.

WHY will inevitably take you to a place of self judgement – so let go of that one. It doesn’t matter WHY. It is probably way too late to fix WHY anyway.

  • Why should I care?
  • Why haven’t I done this already?
  • Why is this taking so long?
  • Why can others accomplish this goal, and I’m have such a hard time?
  • Why doesn’t anyone help me?
  • Why doesn’t my partner support me?………

So let’s get back to WHAT would you attempt if you knew you couldn’t fail?

Do you remember your dreams when you were little? One of my dreams was to be a surgeon. Later, I decided I wanted to be a Queen. When I was little, everything seemed possible. As children, we are natural masters at the Law of Attraction. Remember allowing your dreams to expand and fill your days with wonder? I lived in a neighborhood where there was a lot of home construction going on. My friends and I spent hours in those open building pretending that we were queens, presidents, big-wig bosses and we’d act out all those dreams. I even had the lingo, the walk, the imagined wardrobe – enormous clarity around my dream.

My dreams of surgeon and Queen went away not due to lack of crystal clarity, but the failure to marry those dreams to action plans. Of course, I forgive my eight year old Self for not creating an action plan toward medical school and my ten year old self for not having a clue how to become a queen.

Today I’m older and wiser. My dream of connecting my newest published book to those thousands of people who are looking for that wisdom is very clear, as is my action plan toward that vision. Here’s some questions that might help you turn your wonderful dreams into reality:

  1. What is my goal?
  2. What is my plan?
  3. What will I do today to get inspired?
  4. What specific steps will I take today toward that goal?
  5. What am I willing to do today, assuming I will be successful?
  6. How will I reward myself today for staying with my plan?

Add your voice the the conversation, what will you do today to get inspired?

Posted in Create your Business, Create your Career, Just Stuck | Tagged , , , | 5 Comments

Action from a Creation Mind-set

Posted on October 17, 2010 by sheryl

We live in a society that believes in competition and rewards “winners” and ignores “losers”.  In this context, it is challenging to create action plans that truly out picture a belief in abundance, in plenty for all, and in manifesting what you want through the Law of Attraction.  It takes a different kind of surrender to your own innate power as a creator to engage the Law of Action with the Law of Attraction.
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